Spots the Bard

"Am I not hilarious?"Spots the Bard is a bard in service of Sir Richard Pugsley. Pugsley think he is rather annoying though and thus keeps him permanently stationed at the Pugsley encampment at the Tourney Grounds, where Spots continues to use his admittedly rather poor sense of humor to pester all the unfortunate souls who buy his infamous Book of Jokes for 5 golden nuggets.

Appearance and Character
Spots is a tall, lanky man with a shiny bald head and very bushy eyebrows. He is never seen without his purple flowing robe with high collar, he also wears a cape of the same color. Spots believes himself to be a comedic genius and often laughs at his own jokes, even while retelling them for the thousandth time. It is assumed by pretty much everyone that his humor is a defense mechanism stemming from an unhappy childhood.

Trivia

 * The only review written about his Book of Jokes was written by himself.
 * Spots is never actually referred to by his name in the playable map, instead he is simply called Bard or The Bard.
 * It is possible for Spots to get killed during George's raid on the Tourney Grounds.

Jokes

 *  Why are there no casinos in Africa? - Because there's too many cheetahs! 
 *  A sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender responds: 'Sorry, we don't serve food here.' 
 *  Why was the broom late for work? - He overswept! 
 *  How do you arrest a sick person? - Put him in hand coughs! 

Quotes by Spots the bard

 *   Am I not hilarious?''
 *  Why aren't you laughing? 

Quotes about Spots the bard

 *  The Bard is an unfunny cunt.